


firebug

by imposterhuman



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: AU-gust 2020, Alternate Universe - Firefighters, Bucky Barnes & Tony Stark Friendship, Established Relationship, Firefighter Steve Rogers, Fluff, Human Disaster Tony Stark, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-18
Updated: 2020-08-18
Packaged: 2021-03-06 09:01:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,056
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25967050
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/imposterhuman/pseuds/imposterhuman
Summary: Tony wasnevercooking again.Really, he never should have been cooking in the first place, seeing as every time he tried, there was an incident. The Great Ramen Fire of 1987 (named by Rhodey, of course) and the time that he’d lit his microwave on fire trying to make instant mac and cheese came to mind. He probably should’ve learned his lesson years ago, but somehow, he always thought cooking was a good idea before it blew up in his face (often literally).This disaster was entirely his fault, he knew, but he was still going to blame Steve. If his boyfriend had just agreed to pick up Indian food on his way home from work, Tony would never have been near the stove in the first place, and his apartment wouldn’t be lightly singed.
Relationships: Steve Rogers/Tony Stark
Comments: 5
Kudos: 234





	firebug

**Author's Note:**

> for au-gust day 17: firefighters au
> 
> enjoy!!

Tony was  _ never  _ cooking again. 

Really, he never should have been cooking in the first place, seeing as every time he tried, there was an incident. The Great Ramen Fire of 1987 (named by Rhodey, of course) and the time that he’d lit his microwave on fire trying to make instant mac and cheese came to mind. He probably should’ve learned his lesson years ago, but somehow, he always thought cooking was a good idea before it blew up in his face (often literally).

This disaster was entirely his fault, he knew, but he was still going to blame Steve. If his boyfriend had just agreed to pick up Indian food on his way home from work, Tony would never have been near the stove in the first place, and his apartment wouldn’t be lightly singed. 

So maybe lightly singed was a bit of an understatement, according to one of the firefighters who’d put out the blaze. Bucky was alternating between cracking up and trying to give Tony a stern look. Steve’s best friend was a menace like that. Tony wondered if it was too late for Steve to trade him in for a different one.

“Just wait until Stevie gets in here,” he wheezed, red faced with laughter. “How did you even manage this?”

Tony pouted and crossed his arms. “That’s not important,” he said airily. “What matters is that  _ you  _ sprayed water all over my dinner!”

“That was food?” Bucky stared into the pot on the stove. Tony could admit that it didn’t look like much, even before it had been soaked. But he’d worked hard on it! 

“Get out of my house, Barnes,” Tony huffed with a roll of his eyes. “And when you get back to the station, don’t tell Steve--”

“Don’t tell me what?” Steve rumbled from the doorway. He was leaning against the frame, arms crossed lightly, with an unreadable expression on his face. He was dressed in his full firefighter gear, minus the dorky little hat, which dangled from one of his hands. “Tones, if you wanted me to come home earlier, there were easier ways to say that. You didn’t have to light the place on fire.”

“Steve!” Tony grinned widely, shifting to block his boyfriend’s view of the kitchen nightmare. “I thought you were at the station.”

“Funny story, actually,” Steve drawled, the twist of his lips showing his amusement. “We got a call that someone lit their apartment on fire in this building, and I figured I’d come to check it out, seeing as my boyfriend lives here and all. Lo and behold, I see that the fire is coming from your apartment! Care to explain what that’s about?”

Tony winced guiltily. Bucky whistled, patting him on the shoulder. “Good luck, dude,” he stage whispered, flashing Tony a thumbs up as he not-so-subtly fled the room, leaving Tony and Steve alone.

“In my defense…” Tony started, scrambling for a defense that explained both his complete and utter incompetence in the kitchen and his inability to learn from past culinary mistakes. It was harder than it seemed. He settled on a hand gesture that he hoped encompassed it all, but by the look on Steve’s face, it meant nothing.

Steve raised an eyebrow. “Yeah?”

“That was actually all I had,” Tony smiled sheepishly. “I was cooking and I honestly don’t know what went wrong. Maybe I’m cursed. One minute, the pasta was cooking just fine, the next I almost lost my eyebrows. Do you know how bad I’d look without eyebrows?”

Steve’s calm composure finally cracked and the man relaxed, coming fully into the kitchen. “That’s very true,” he said, smiling crookedly. “You’d look terrible without eyebrows. I’d probably have to break up with you on principle.”

“And I wouldn’t even be able to protest,” Tony agreed. He shuffled his feet for a moment, then tentatively asked, “Are you mad? I completely get it if you are-- I burned the kitchen down, for fuck’s sake, and I feel horrible about it-- I just need to know.”

Steve shook his head. “Accidents happen,” he said. “I know that better than anyone. I’m just glad you didn’t get hurt. I was terrified when I got the call, Tony.”

“I’m sorry,” Tony said softly, wrapping his arms around Steve. His boyfriend smelled like smoke, the way he usually did after a long day at the station. His uniform was rough against Tony’s skin, but he still clung on tightly. Steve held him back, his chin resting on top of Tony’s head. “I won’t do it again.”

Tony could feel Steve’s chuckle rumble through his chest. “Now, let’s not go making promises we can’t keep, firebug,” he teased. “Didn’t you say that after the toaster incident last year?”

Tony squawked indignantly, freeing himself from Steve’s arms to give his boyfriend an offended look. “That one doesn’t count!” he scowled. “We put that out with the fire extinguisher, and the smoke alarms didn’t even go off! I refuse to acknowledge that as an incident.”

“Your standards for an incident are far too high,” Steve said with a fond sort of sigh. “One of these days, you’re gonna burn the building down.”

“Then it’s a good thing I have a firefighter boyfriend to put it out, huh?” Tony grinned. 

“No more fires,” Steve said sternly, a hint of a smile on his lips. 

“No more fires,” Tony agreed easily. “Unless you make me cook again. Really, this can be traced back directly to you refusing to pick up dinner. I’d never go so far as to say this was your fault, but if the shoe fits...”

Steve put his head in his hands. “Next time, just order a pizza,” he laughed. “You’re a complete disaster, you know that?”

“Yeah, but I’m your disaster,” Tony preened, pressing a quick kiss to Steve’s cheek. He led them out of the destroyed kitchen and to the relatively unscathed dinner table, discreetly brushing some soot off of it before Steve could see it. “I think we should order that pizza now; I’m starting to get hungry. You want pepperoni?”

"Pepperoni sounds great," Steve said, sitting down. "You think you can order pizza without lighting anything else on fire?"

Tony, like the mature adult he was, stuck out his tongue. Just for that, he wasn't getting extra cheese.

**Author's Note:**

> comments and kudos make me happy :))
> 
> come talk to me on tumblr [@imposter-human](https://imposter-human.tumblr.com/)


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